Radical Together Review

Radical Together by David Platt is probably one of the most brutal books I've ever read, but I absolutely loved it. It was better than Radical, in my opinion, because Platt clears up some of the things he said in Radical. For example, he talks about how we will never be radical enough or obedient enough or make enough disciples to be accepted and loved by God. Therefore, we must rest in Christ's obedience and sufficiency. Also, rather than making blanket statements about how all Christians should live, Platt simply talks about what The Church at Brook Hills does: their obedience, their failures, their plans. He emphasizes the need not only for local "missional living," but also for international missions and he explains how the 2 go hand-in-hand.

This is probably the most challenging book I've ever read. I definitely recommend it for every pastor, youth leader, Sunday school teacher, and church member.

WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group provided this book to me for free in exchange for this honest review as part of their Blogging for Books program.

Primal Review

Primal by Mark Batterson is truly one of the most inspiring books I've ever read. When I closed the book after I finished, I literally whispered "wow" about ten times.

The book basically dissects the Great Commandment...Love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. Batterson writes intensively about each area in which we are to love God. The readers learn about loving God through compassion for the poor, wonder at creation, education, and physical labor.

In typical Batterson fashion, the book is written in a full, informative, fast-paced style and leaves you eager to begin the new reformation by loving God with all you are. I highly recommend it for anyone who struggles with a lack of desire to give, learn, create, or work.

WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group provided this book to me for free in exchange for this honest review as part of their Blogging for Books program.

see ya

So... this blog has been with me through a lot, but...it's time to move on.

That being said, I started a new blog over on Weebly ( dumb name, but whatever). Check it out, folks!

http://t.co/crHiGFh

See you over there. :)

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae

praise God from whom all blessings flow

Hello dear friends!

Church today was the most beautiful experience...we got there too late to hear the sermon, as usual...but every moment of it was beautiful...All my friends are finally back in town, so it was like one big family reunion. And God is working...so much...in their lives. I've been praying for my dear friend Ashley for several months; she shared with me one day the many struggles she was having and I prayed that Christ would captivate her and that she would give up all her empty pursuits and pursue Christ alone...and today she told me of the changes taking place in her life and how while she was on a mission trip to Ohio last week, she "rededicated" her life to Christ. so beautiful. I'm more convinced than ever that Christ is worthy of absolutely everything I could give. In seeking Him and pursuing Him and obeying Him, He fills my heart with greater joy than anything else could. My friend Andrea's brother was saved while in Ohio! She's been praying for him, as have many other people, and we are so excited about this! 4 other people were saved on the trip and apparently just about everyone had a majorly life-changing come-to-Jesus meeting. Praise God times infinity! It's amazing how so much of what happened in Ohio mirrored what happened in Kentucky. The Lord saved 5 people! And I think I speak for the entire team (or at least for AHAM) that we are changed. It is so beautiful to be with people who love Christ and pursue Him and wrestle with Him. I love them so much and I'm so thankful for their friendship.

Anyways, I have so much more to process and so much more is happening than I can write about and to every sentence there are a thousand subtexts, but basically, God is good. And as my mom said to me earlier, we need to be prepared because where God is at work, Satan is at work. I know that sounds dumb, but it's true. But we have the ultimate victory over him and because of that, we can have victory over him in the next few weeks and months as we figure out how to glorify God with changed hearts.

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae

Big Appalachian Adventure

Hello friends! Greetings from Kentucky!

Several people from my church came here to help with our friend's (Hannah's) church's VBS. It has truly been one of the greatest weeks of my life. The four teenagers --Autumn, Hannah, Alex, and yours truly-- have had a Bible study every night. It's been really encouraging to say the least. We also signed Hannah and Alex up for Twitter, which is very exciting you know. They're all homeschoolers, so they've been giving me lots of advice for next year. (Did you catch that subtle announcement? haha.) But yeah, even though I'm super excited about homeschooling and really thankful for the opportunity, I've been a little worried about everything, but it's been good to talk things over with everyone.
We've been "canvasing" the city and handing out fliers, which has been interesting to say the least.

Anyway, this a totally short update, but VBS starts in 6 minutes so I'll update more later.

Much Love,
Marissa Lanae

Untamed

Untamed by Lisa Harper is an interesting mix of in-depth theology, a conversational writing style, and inspiring life applications. The author clears away a lot of misconceptions regarding our Savior as she walks through various scenes of the four Gospels, narrating them in modern language and explaining the historical significance and controversy behind Christ's actions. She offers a glimpse of a Savior who is wild, controversial, compelling, and compassionate.

Though the writing itself is overly simple and rarely eloquent, Harper's message is significant enough to make readers look past the poor writing style.

If you want to learn more about Christ's earthly ministry and how it applies to our daily pursuit of Him, this is definitely a book you'll want to read.

WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group provided this book to me for free in exchange for this honest review as part of their Blogging for Books program.

writing, writing, going to class and writing. funfunfunfun.

Hey friends!

I'm currently on Day 7 of 12 at the Rhodes Summer Writing Institute! In the past 7 days, I've written 8 papers. Crazy! I've been learning all about post-modernism, feminism, the iceberg principle, analyzing literature, the meaning of literature, hipsters, spelling, and so much more! ha. Even though at various times this past week I have had cry fests in the community bathroom and promised myself I would never write another word after I got home, I've really grown in my love for the art. The people in my class are so incredibly talented that it inspires me to work to get better. Usually I'm one of the better writers in my grade and I'm near the top of my class, but here everyone reads impressive books and makes good grades and gets complimented on his/her writing ability. So, needless to say, I'm being really challenged and inspired.

And I'm also the only one who has never read Harry Potter. I'm not allowed, ok?! haha.

I was pretty nervous about coming here because of all the crazy medical issues I've been dealing with, but I literally rested for the entire week that I was supposed to go to the beach so I felt quite a bit better. And I prayed about coming here and felt really at peace with my decision to come. And I'm so glad I did!

I've learned so much spiritually, academically, and relationally. It's been a really big culture shock; I realized that I've never really been anywhere that didn't fall under the "Christian" umbrella...I've either homeschooled or gone to a private Christian school, gone to church, church camps, mission trips, etc. Here it's just...different. There isn't a devotional in the morning or a prayer before meals, no Christianeze or worship services. But I feel like having that freedom has strengthened my relationship with the Lord and my faith family. I might share more later, but trust me, the Lord has majorly, majorly, majorly (I repeat things for emphasis. Emphasis!) opened my eyes to a lot of things.

And some of those eye-opening things have been a part of the inspiration Kendyl and I and a few other people have had to plan a party for the girls in our youth group. I'm really excited to get to know the girls better. This week I've realized how imperative it is to not only be remaining in and seeking the Lord but also to encourage and support and live in unison with other believers. And I'm hoping this will help develop stronger relationships and everything. And if not, at least it will be fun! ;)

Well, I'm gonna head out and find something fun to do... that's another thing; I've been socializing so much this week...I'll have to write more about that later. haha.

Much Love,
Marissa Lanae

Not my will but Yours be done

"Now listen, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.' Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, 'If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.'"-James 4:13-15

I would say that this verse sums up this whole year, particularly the past 2 months.

In January I thought my days of not being able to eat were over completely, but in February that terrifying nerve sensation came back and I haven't been able to swallow normally since. That was the first surprise. The next would come 2 months later.

At the end of my spring break, I wrote down different goals for the last quarter of the year. Things like "Make a 34 on the ACT," "Make an A+in every class," "Work out every day." Let's just say, I didn't really meet any of them...

The first week in April I went to a new doctor who made me cry gave me this new medicine to try that would heal me in three days and give me tons and tons of energy. I thought that sounded lovely, so I began taking it. Within 3 days, I thought I was going to absolutely pass out. It was horrible. I'm a high school student, so I know exhaustion all too well, but this was not exhaustion. This was fatigue. I could hardly think clearly and I literally felt like a 200-pound person was sitting on top of me. So I stayed home for a few days to recuperate and I thought I was good to go. Little did I know that the side effects last 6-8 weeks. Six to eight weeks, people! So basically, instead of meeting my over-achieving, self-glorifying goals, I was lying in bed barely able to move. Not fun.

Another unexpected event came my way this past Monday. I went on Facebook, expecting just to read lighthearted posts about summer and friends and the like. Instead I went on there and found out that 2 of my friends had died earlier that day. I was completely stunned. I still can't even fathom it. It's so, so sad.

And then there was yesterday... morning... My Sunday school teacher wasn't going to be there so she asked us to figure something out. So I volunteered. I spent quite a bit of time planning my lesson and practicing what I was going to say and I knew that the girls in my class love to talk, so I wasn't too terribly worried, just a little nervous. I love Sunday school a lot so I was really looking forward to teaching and saying a bunch of really brilliant things like other Sunday school teachers do. I prayed and prayed and prayed over my lesson and my classmates and that His will would be done. I had everything nice and neat and planned out and it. BOMBED. It was, hands-down, the most awkward class we've ever had. I won't go into all the gory, embarrassing details, but literally everything went wrong. Oh, Murphy's law and its accuracy.

And then there was yesterday...evening... I spent all day buying stuff for camp this week... all the stuff for my special diet... and more than ever I was ready for just a slight break from my surroundings. But I was completely and utterly fatigued. I still haven't gotten my energy back from before I took that horrible medicine. So around midnight last night, we decided I should just skip camp this year. I'm supposed to be on a bus right now heading for Alabama, but instead I'm sitting at home. Which stinks. I really, really wanted to go. But I know I don't have the energy for it... but it still makes me sad... but i know it's for the best. internal conflict ftw! ;)

Anyways, those are just a few of the many unexpected occurrences that have, in fact, occurred as of late. But I'm learning a lot and trusting the Lord and reminding myself that even if nothing is ever ok, one day everything will be glorious.

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae

P.S. "In their hearts humans plan their course,but the LORD establishes their steps." -Proverbs 16:9

In A Pit With A Lion on A Snowy Day Review

I honestly didn't expect to learn very much from In a Pit With A Lion on a Snowy Day by Mark Batterson, but I was very pleasantly surprised.

The main thesis of the book is that Christians should take risks and trust God, rather than giving in to fear or complacency. He encourages readers to change their perspective of trials and look at them as opportunities for God to do a miracle rather than as needless burdens.

Batterson uses illustrations from the Bible, history, and his own life to reinforce his points. His writing style, although not exceedingly impressive, is explicit and concise. Batterson possesses a great deal of knowledge, which shines through in this book.

If you're going through a hard time, struggling with a decision, or need some motivation to step out of your complacent zone, I highly recommend this book to you.

WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group provided this book to me for free in exchange for this honest review as part of their Blogging for Books program.

school never ends.

Hello friends!

So...If I had to pick my favorite thing about my life right now, it would probably be the fact that EVERYONE ELSE IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE IS OUT OF SCHOOL AND I'M SITTING AT HOME WITH APPROXIMATELY 56830 ASSIGNMENTS AND EXAMS TO DO AND STUDY FOR.

Glad I could get that out of my system.

But really, this is not very fun.

Joy in the Lord, right?

:)

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae

Desiring God review

Desiring God by John Piper is a book unlike most modern Christian books I've read, in that it is appealing not only spiritually but intellectually. Every single paragraph is full of deep, well-founded spiritual thoughts. It's not a book one can read quickly or passively; it must be pondered and questioned.

I didn't agree with everything he said, but his ideas were certainly interesting. He argues that Christians must find their joy in God and that ultimately all obedience should come from a desire to make our joy complete. He consistently repeats that this idea is not selfish but is, in fact, biblical. His insistence of that point is slightly overstated and it seems as though he is trying too hard to justify his ideas to the critics, but he does provide convincing biblical evidence for his ideas.

Piper doesn't make practical applications crystal clear. Instead he leaves room for the reader to find out how to apply the principles to his or her own life.

In conclusion, if you're looking for a book to challenge you spiritually, intellectually, and practically, this is the book for you.

I'm kinda busy, kinda busy, kinda bih-zayyy

Do you ever have one of those times in life when you just have so much going on that you feel certain you're about to collapse?

I'm pretty sure that's happening now for me. I have 3 hefty projects and 2 large research papers due within the next 25 days, along with the usual hugemungus amount of schoolwork I have to do. Along with applying for fancy summer writing camps and actually writing a lot so I don't embarrass myself in case I get into aforementioned camps. And keeping up with chores and Sunday School stuff and reading. And that just scratches the surface, really.

And I love it.

I love being busy and having all these responsibilities and learning how to deal with hectic schedules and long days and late nights. I love learning to depend on God on a minute-ly basis for strength and wisdom. I remember one time Kendyl and I were watching The Office and one of the ladies (I can't remember her name, which is sad) said "I'm head of the party-planning committee. I love being head of the party-planning committee." And at that exact moment, I decided to adopt the same attitude toward all of my commitments and such. I love the things I get to do.

But that being said, things can get pretty intense.

Succeeding and meeting goals aren't the most important things in life, but they're part of the story I want to tell during this time in my life. And doing so means working really hard and giving up things you want to do and staying at home while all your friends our out D-NOW-ing it up (ahem).

And sometimes, as a wise friend once said to me, "Responsibility stinks." That it does. But things could be much, much worse.

Anyways, this is kind of a random post and I'm pretty sure I'm half asleep right now. But this is basically my thought process at the moment. I think it's good to write down your thoughts (or at least the thoughts and attitude you want to have) so you can pull it out and feel inspired whenever all the bad-attitude-Bobs and negative Nancies try to harsh your mellow.

(Not that you have to some crazy way-too-optimistic clown or anything...I just think a good attitude is a good thing to have, you know).

And just remember, when life gets tough and overwhelming, "It's only time. But it flies right by. And today is sweeter than we know."

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae

Vines, Eyes, and Friday Nights

Hello friends!

I hope you've had a good week. This week was certainly interesting. It's been one of those soul-searching, conviction, and growth kind of weeks for me.

I spent my Sunday evening writing up all my goals for this school quarter. I think it's good to re-evaluate our habits and our direction and everything. If you ever need any inspiration to make changes, I recommend the Declaration of Independence. Honestly, it inspires me so much. Not to mention how beautiful it is.

I've missed Gulfport so much this week. I miss everything about it. Being the only child still at home really stinks sometimes. I'm all for solitude and meditation and all that, but sometimes I just need a lot of people around. Or not even a lot of people. Just 7 beautiful, honest, encouraging, Jesus-pursuing girls...in a little trailer...in a little town called Gulfport.

John 15:5 has most definitely been my life's theme this week... "I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I remain in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." Apart from Him I can do nothing. I can't depend on my cheap attempts at optimism to get through my trials; I must depend on Him for my joy. I can't depend on some hippie "peace and love" mentality to truly love and value people; I must depend on Him to give me love for others and to love through me. On my own, I am judgmental and make no effort whatsoever to be understanding of other people and their choices; only through Him can I have patience and eyes to see that the people I perceive to be just "jerk faces" are God's beautiful creations who have so much potential. People struggle with all different things, and on my own I spend all my efforts criticizing them and feeling hurt by them; only by His conviction and strength can I instead spend my time praying for and loving them. He must become greater.

That last paragraph was probably a bit vague, but it's pretty much a summary of everything the Holy Spirit has been teaching me this week.

I've been listening to really strange music all week... from The Weepies to Yellowcard (their new stuff is super great, by the way) to Superchick (if you want to start your day off right, they are a great tired-unmotivated-mad-at-the-world band... I mean, they themselves aren't like that, but they are encouraging to those who are! ha).

Oh! A lifelong dream came true this week. Ever since I met my four-eyed friend named Autumn in 2nd grade, I've been pretty much jealous of everyone who wears glasses. But not anymore! That's right; I have my very own! I didn't really realize how dorky and/or hipster they were when I picked them out, but you know.

Well, I need to go "get down" [on the floor buried in a pile of textbooks, that is] because, in case you haven't heard, it's Friday, Friday. ;)

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae

The Gulfport Post

Hello friends!

So, tomorrow is definitely my last day of spring break and I'm definitely sad about that. This past week has truly passed so quickly. I'll try to fill you in on everything that's happened...

We left bright and early Saturday morning for Gulfport! Oh man, where do I begin talking about this trip? It was so great. I learned so much and deepened so many relationships. It was nothing short of beautiful. Two of my closest friends went this year, whereas last year I was hardly acquaintances with anyone who went. Their being there definitely presented some new challenges.

For one, there was some major cliquey-ness going on in the beginning, but we prayed about it quite a bit and by the end of the week, we had all grown so much closer to each other. That's not to say that everything was peachy-keen at the end of the week because there was/is definitely still tension and conflict, but I'd say we all made an effort to reach out to each other.

Another challenge was in guarding words. I'm a pretty quiet person so I know I don't struggle with "taming my tongue" as much as some people do, but I still struggle with it. The pastor at the church we worked with challenged us on Sunday morning to be encouragers, both through our words and through our actions. A lot of times I kind of feel like I get a free pass on the whole "words of encouragement" thing because I'm really quiet and sensitive and feel entitled to receiving encouragement rather than giving it. But some of the most outgoing girls there were talking about how much hope a single hug or word of encouragement can bring them on the most hopeless days. One of the girls said something along the lines of "When you're having a bad day, the first thing you're going to think of is the unkind words spoken to you as a joke." We can do so much with our words; they have power for life or death, literally. I want to speak words of life and love and not waste my time "jokingly" tearing other people down when I have the opportunity to build them up. I think back to all the times I've been bullied and I wonder how different my life might be had people used their words to encourage me rather than taunt me.

I hope it doesn't sound like I'm not glad they went; I completely am and I'm so grateful for these challenges... It was just so very different from last year.

The lady who chaperoned us, Ms. Barbra, challenged us all to learn one new fact about each of the girls there. I absolutely loved learning more about everyone. I definitely want to start getting to know all of my friends better.

Another thing I loved was "circle time." Each night we would circle up in the main room of our trailer, sitting on teensy tiny chairs, and just talk for hours. We laughed and cried and prayed and sang. We poured our hearts out and received attention, support, and encouragement. I miss circle time with the trailer girls!

I had the greatest birthday EVER on Tuesday. I was sung to eight stinking times. And there was much cake involved. And many texts and phone calls. And many "Happy Birthday"s. And plenty of embarrassment. ;) I've genuinely never felt so loved. It was a wonderful day.

I met so many interesting people and had so many great experiences. I know there's a lot more to say, but I'll leave it at this for now. :)

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae

As the week draws to a close...

Hello! I've been blogging so much lately. I think this new font I selected just really inspires me. I guess I should keep up the trend. The following is a list of things pertaining to this past week. Enjoy!

• Seeing the school play. Plays are literally the best, (especially musicals!) and this one did not disappoint. Except that I sat by people I didn't know. And that was awkward. Plus the guy next to me totally reeked of cigarette smoke. Oh, private school...
• 
  
• The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom. I'm really trying to make reading a priority. I absolutely love books, but I always feel a bit guilty for reading when I should be studying or something. But my parents are always telling me I need to make time for rest and fun activities, so really, if I don't read, I'm breaking the 5th commandment! Ha. Anyways, this book is truly stunning and inspiring. Her honest faith is just breath-taking and refreshing.
• 
  
• Barton Hollow by The Civil War. I've heard nothing but good things about this album. Literally, everyone loves it. So when I saw it in the $5 section on Amazon, I decided to buy it. It's so chill and delightful.
• 
  
• March. Such a good month. My birthday, Gulfport, springy weather.... so great. March 1 just brings a certain sense of hopeful delight.
• Sweet people. Kindness is one of those things in life I value deeply, and there was certainly plenty of it this week. Encouraging conversations, people being super considerate... they truly make my life so much better.
• 
  
• I lost my keys for the first time. I think I've arrived. I can finally relate to the "losing your keys" part of that list people make of things that go wrong in the morning.
• 
  
• Speaking of crummy mornings, this morning was truly so crummy. I've been trying so hard not to go to sleep until all my work is done, but last night I just crashed around midnight having only done a little bit of my work. I woke up around 6, completely stressed. But if there's one thing I've learned the past 2 months, it's that I can trust Jesus in everything, including (and perhaps especially at this point in my life) my schoolwork. I'll leave it at that, but trust me, I could not have survived today without trusting Him.

Well, that's all for now. I'm off to read the National Geographic, 'cause that's what I do on Friday nights. ;)

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae

Afternoon In the Life...

...of a student. More specifically, a slow-working, undiagnosed-ADD, not-very-smart student. Namely, me. Today's time of homework (which is still in full swing, mind you) has been particularly hard for some reason. But I'm determined to have a good attitude. Determined. The pastor at the church I went to today said that greatness is the peak of the mountain that has been climbed laboriously for many years. That success means burning the midnight oil when everyone else is out living it up (or sleeping; they're practically synonymous). So, with those sentiments in my mind, the strength of the Lord in my heart, and a cup of coffee in my hand, I will press on through the wee hours of the morning, studying and reading and writing.

Nothing worth having comes easy. The pain makes the city more beautiful. etc. etc. (I need lots of inspiration, you see).

Anyways, I'm a terrible time-manager, so in an effort to get better in that area, I've kept a detailed account of how I've spent my time this afternoon/evening and since I know you're all interested in it, I'm going to post it. Enjoy!

2:28- reading Sparknotes

3:10- watching Julius Caesar on Youtube

3:22- Creeping around on Tumblr

3:40- Taking a few photos and sending a text

3:53- Geometry

4:23- Second Geometry lesson

4:31- finished with geometry

4:37- reading blogs

4:40- Twittering

4:58- writing a paper

5:41- Twittering

5:52- writing a paper

6:15- dinner

6:25- lab write-up

6:49- blog-reading

6:55- continuing with the grueling write-up

7:03- coffee break

7:13- lab

8:07- ice cream break

8:23- back to lab write-up

9:05- break from the Lab of Doom to print off some papers

9:10- "5-minute nap"

12:10- wake up

12:12- Twitter

12:42- writing this

I know you are probably super jealous of my life right now. Super jealous.

Anyways, I've wasted enough of my time that could have been spent much more wisely, so I'm going to log off.

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae

Love WIns

If you're on Twitter, you've undoubtedly heard some of the scandal involving Rob Bell, and I just wanted to add my two cents. I, for one, think it's absolutely incredible that he's a worldwide trending topic on Twitter; how crazy is that?

I have a ton of respect for Rob Bell. A ton. I read Velvet Elvis a few years and it changed my perspective so much. He's not about easy answers and ignorant-yet-blissful theology.

He's about questions... pondering, wrestling, believing in a God who doesn't give us all the answers.

When I first recognized salvation, I knew I needed to have a relationship with God that wasn't about Sunday School answers and neatly-packaged ideas. I needed questions with answers I'm not allowed to know. I needed a journey, needed to dive into something weird and mysterious.

And that's not an easy thing.

I talk to my sweet little friends who have everything perfectly figured out in their heads, always ready with a conversation-ending verse from scripture that supposedly answers all my questions and doubts. I love those friends dearly, but I don't really understand them. I'm not saying that black and white don't exist, just that they often combine to form gray. Truth is a hard thing to come by (yes, even when it comes to the Bible) and I think everyone has valuable opinions that don't need to be ignored.

It seems that having all the answers takes away the beauty of pursuit, maybe even takes away the pursuit altogether.

I guess I'm not really a black-and-white thinker, and I think that's a good way to be. But other people are black-and-white thinkers and they know that that is the only way to be. And some people think one thing and other people think other things and everyone thinks of himself or herself as being right.

So really, you can see the problem.

Anyways, I can easily get caught up in blissfully ignorant Sunday school answer theology, but the past few days for me have been full of questions and doubts, pondering and confusion, and Rob Bell is the first person I ever remember hearing say that all of that is okay.

All the questions, stabs in the dark, struggling, and wrestling...they're all okay.

God is bigger than my ideas... confusion... restlessness. Bigger than black and white and gray.

In the words of Rob Bell, "The moment God is figured out with nice neat lines and definitions, we are no longer dealing with God."

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae

-Donald Miller, Blue Like Jazz

Weekend Words

Rest.
Knowledge.
Music & Lyrics.
Frustration.
Whistling Winds.
Fashion.
Cotton Candy Sky.
Naps.
Rain.
Imperfect.
Inspiration.
Thirst.
Uncertain.
Books.
Stories.
Church.
Productivity.
Discipline.
Poetry.
Warmth.
Inflexible.
Unconditional love.
Priorities.
Balloons.
Games.
Space.
Anagrams.
Pride.
Conflict.
Conviction.
Weakness.
Academics.
Chai tea.
Weightless.

A Writer's Life for Me

These are all the notebooks I'm using right now (well, minus the ones I use for school). There are 8 of them. I love them all and they all serve slightly different purposes.

The One on the Bottom is dark blue and I use it during my devotion time. I write down Bible verses, things the Holy Spirit shows me while I'm reading, prayer requests, and quotations from the book I'm reading, which right now happens to be The Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer.

The Next One is invisible apparently. It's actually black, but it's not even the notebook I use; I've misplaced the one I actually use so I had to use a stand-in for the picture. I use this one for sermon and Sunday school notes and sometimes for drawing and other times for making lists of cliche things youth speakers do. (I have half a page dedicated to the cliche youth-pastory things a guy did a conference I went to last year. The list includes such things as "Claiming to have ADD, wearing a social justice t-shirt, making numerous pop culture references, etc.)

The Blue One is for book quotations. I feel like underlining in books is disrespectful or something, so instead I employ much time to copying large chunks of books word-for-word.

The Yellow One is for philosophy. My school doesn't offer a specific class for studying philosophy and I think it's an important subject to learn about, so I teach myself. Well, sort of. I downloaded some lectures from iTunes and listen to those when I get a chance. I take notes in this notebook.

The Striped One is my "writer's notebook." I'm not exactly sure how to describe it, but I write stories and thoughts and poetry and such in here. This is the one I use to try to "hone my craft," so to speak.

The Red One is my diary, I guess you could say. It probably contains the most personal things and the most detailed accounts. I use this one for "throwing up" (definitely for lack of a better term) my thoughts and feelings.

The Small Green One is for poetry. Poetry is something I mostly enjoy consuming rather than creating. In this notebook I write down the poems I enjoy.

The Stack of Cards with a Clippy is the real-time "notebook." I take it with me pretty much everywhere I go and write down things as they happen so I don't forget anything.

So there you have it, folks. My stack of beloved notebooks. I've wanted to be a writer since I was 3 and my obsession with notebooks started around that same time. If my house ever goes up in flames, I will pray for time to drag out all of my ginormous boxes of journals. There's just something so wonderful about the written word. :)

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae

Radical Review

Today I'll be reviewing the book Radical by David Platt.

There has certainly been plenty of hype surrounding this book over the past couple of months. I've heard various opinions about it, some people saying it is the most life-changing book ever and some saying that Platt is merely seeking to endorse the "poverty gospel." So I decided to check the book out for myself.

This book honestly sums up a lot of the struggles and thoughts I've had over the past two years, ever since I discovered those verses in the Bible about selling everything to give to the poor and not being worthy to be a disciple unless I pick up a cross and hate my life and my parents. At first glance those principles seemed relatively simple, but as I have tried to figure out how to really live them out, I've learned that they are anything but simple.

Platt addresses those verses and the misconceptions associated with them. He brings a great deal of balance between the vow-of-poverty-social-justice believers and the evangelism-crusade believers, arguing that they can't exist apart from each other. He offers a few practical ways to live in "radical obedience" but ultimately says that we should first and foremost seek the Holy Spirit's guidance.

For the record, not only does he not preach the poverty gospel, he spends a good solid couple of paragraphs explaining why such a gospel is no gospel at all.

Basically, I think Platt offers some solid biblical ideas and perspectives, and I certainly recommend Radical.

Some things in life are unforgettable

If I could give you one piece of advice right now, not for all time but for right now, it would be to not forget. To not forget the things that inspire you, that make you laugh and cry, that make you question and doubt, that make you feel alive and like your life has meaning, that make you fear, that make you grow. Don't forget the sunsets and the sandcastles, the obnoxious sun and the torrential rain... the aspects of nature that remind us who we are and who God is. Don't forget the days you could barely survive or the ones you never wanted to end.

That's why I write mostly... so I don't forget.

That's why I'm writing this... so I don't forget the beauty and the mess that were this past year.

I set a few goals; I wanted to memorize the New Testament, for one. I didn't do that, but I spent a few months reading through the book of Acts and I was surprised by how much I remembered of it, or how much would come back to my mind throughout the day, when I was just reading through it and soaking it up and praying for "illumination." Another goal I set was to read 40 books. I fell 19 shy, but I read some of the most wonderful books in the world... books that inspired me and changed my perspective. I wanted to train and run a half-marathon this year; that didn't happen, but over the summer I got into the best shape I've ever been in. The only other goal I set was to not buy any clothing items for myself. I think I bought 3 shirts, but they were for good causes. So I didn't meet my goals the way I hoped I would, but I feel like my resolutions were still successes.

"Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn."- C.S. Lewis

That quote pretty much sums up the events of the year. I learned so much, so deeply. It's not that everything that happened the whole entire year was just horrible, but most of the really wonderful times stemmed from the crummy times. The event that impacted me most of the whole year was, hands down, my trip to Gulfport over Spring Break. I was beyond horrified to go... my first official mission trip, not knowing anyone (at least not knowing them well) who was going, etc. But I genuinely felt certain that the Lord wanted me to go, so I did, and it was amazing. Nerve-racking, draining, scary, and often uncomfortable? Oh yes. But I learned so much and grew so much. I think about that trip almost every day.

The main lessons I learned (and am still learning) are equality and fulfillment. Equality... not feeling inferior or superior to anyone. We're all equal. No one is without struggles and fears and hurts, even people who parade their "perfection" and are well-liked and well-respected. Fulfillment... It can't be found in people or success or relationships or a career or in activism or anything except God. I'm not sure how exactly, but I think the first step is understanding that.

That's all for 2010.

Now for 2011...

My resolutions are as follows: Have a "quiet time" every day. I feel guilty for putting this one because apparently setting aside specific time to pray and read La Biblia is supposed to just come naturally if you're truly saved, but, well it doesn't for me and I know how important it is (at least for me) so I'm including it.

Work out at least twice a week, every week. This will honestly probably be my hardest goal. I always forget how much I like working out and how good it feels until I actually do it. Plus I'm in the "I don't have time" excuse crowd.

Read 25 books. I think this will be a good goal for me.

Write every single day. I realized last year that if I ever want to do anything with my writing besides just write on here and jot things down on note cards and in notebooks, I need to start being more disciplined.

Be more content/ complain less. I'm not sure exactly how I know if I'll have had success with this one or not, but these are definitely things I should work on.

Give sacrificially. This one is going to be tough, I'm sure. This means giving up my oh-so-valuable time to help others, because my time and how I spend it and how much I get done each day are really important to me. This also means pouring myself out in relationships; the very thought of that terrifies me, but I know I need to be more deliberate in maintaining friendships and encouraging others and things of that nature.

Those are all the ones I have right now. If you want to be encouraged to make the most of this year, I encourage you to read A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller. It's a great book to read at the beginning of the year (or anytime really).

Much Love,

Marissa Lanae