Just a few thoughts.

Well, hello folks! I haven't written a post in so very long. Enjoy!

Vacation

     My dad's side of the family went to Florida a couple of weeks ago. It was pretty fun. It actually stormed a couple of times, which was wonderful. It got so cold after the storms, though. We'd all be sitting on the beach with towels over us, shivering. There were so many odd people at the beach. Haha. We went to the most wonderful store at Seaside called Central Square Record Store. It was probably the best part of the trip. Francesca Battistelli (I'm not sure if that's spelled right and I don't feel like looking it up, haha) got her engagement pictures taken there and my sister and I had looked at them a few days before so we were like, "Oh my word, that sat at this couch and in front of this door and behind this bookshelf!" It was great. On the last day, we were at this pizza place and the guy who owns all the Bud and Alley's restaurants was being interviewed on camera by these two Chinese guys. It was crazy.

Illnesses

      So a few days into vacation, I started having a lot of trouble swallowing. I'd sit there for like 5 minutes trying to swallow food. By the end of the week, I couldn't even drink anything. We got home Sunday morning and went to the worst doctor in the world that afternoon. She jabbed my throat with a stick, then gave me this terrible medicine to swallow, then she told me to drink as much as possible, then gave me these gigantic pills that I had to crush up, but when I did they tasted like the sewer, then she said that I was just making it up so I'd have an excuse not to eat because I'm anorexic. The next day I went to my pediatrician who was much better and agreed that the first doctor was insane. She sent me to another doctor who was wonderful. He suggested that I have a scope done, so I went in the next day and got an IV and a hospital gown and some amazing Propofol (the stuff that killed Michael Jackson, ha) and they stuck a camera down my throat and took some rockin' pictures of my esophagus. I started swallowing milkshakes and drinks a bit more easily, but I  still couldn't eat solid food, so I got a CT done Monday. I went to an ENT Wednesday and he said the it might be a virus or something neurological. He wanted to do this test, but I started freaking out and crying like a baby, so I'll either go back or get it while under the influence of Propofol. I got part of a fry down the other day, and I've eaten a few cookies, so hopefully I'll just continue to get better and I'll just have to go to the neurologist. So yeah, over the past two weeks, I've literally had three small cookies and a piece of a fry. I've been living off Ensure like an old granny. lol. On top of that, I'm rockin's some killer sinus issues. Oh, and my dad found out that he has some mild skin cancer. I tell you what, we're fallin' apart.  

Band

     Today was the last day of band camp. We're doing The Divine Comedy this year. (That's probably supposed to be italicized or something, but it's summer and I forget these things. lol.) Everyone's so pumped and motivated. Band seems so much less intimidating this year than it did last year. It rained pretty much all week and there was a crazy tornado yesterday during practice, so yeah.

School

     School starts in like two weeks. I've had a really good summer, but I'm ready to go back. I'm so excited about all my classes, and all the teachers I was worried about left the school. Which makes me even more excited because I've definitely spent some time stressing over those classes. The beginning of last year was so overwhelming and numbing, but now I sort of know what to expect and stuff. I got some cool school supplies too, so that always helps. haha. My sister is moving back to the university (ooh, I'm cool. I said university instead of college. ha) this weekend. I'm going to miss her so much.  She's just the best! 

Dating

      I've decided not to date for a while. A long while. Like at least not in the next four years while. I want to spend my time on things that are actually worthwhile and meaningful. Plus, I'm terrible at relationships, so it would just be better for society if I refrained from dating. Pretty much everyone I've told has laughed in my face, ha. But I also want to refrain from getting too emotionally attached to people. Eh, I'm not sure if it should be worded like that, but basically I think you can give your heart to people who have no business possessing such a thing without ever even changing your relationship status on Facebook. And I don't want to do that. My youth pastor was talking about this Wednesday, actually. He said that the person's relationship with the Lord should be the thing that attracts us to them and that we need to make sure we're the type of person someone could marry before we go off looking for someone.

Beauty

     I think every female musician's goal in life is to look drop-dead perfect and make us jealous and then write songs about how beautiful everyone is. A few weeks ago, Miley Cyrus posted some stuff on Twitter about how God made us beautiful and everyone is beautiful and all that jazz. Then there's the song, "Beautiful" by Bethany Dillon and "Mirror" by BarlowGirl and there are books in Christian bookstores that are all about fashion tips and how to look good and feel good about yourself and have high self-esteem. I'm a teenage girl. I'm not always happy with how I look. I definitely have my "I don't feel pretty" days/weeks. But the solution isn't believing that God thinks I'm beautiful. The solution isn't buying new clothes or reading fashion magazines. The solution is getting over myself and realizing that there is more to life than  how I look and how I feel. Jesus wasn't hot. And I don't want God to be just an invisible Tyra Banks or someone who gives me a little self-esteem boost when I need one.

Missions

     I don't hate missions. I don't think it's a sin to go to Uganda and help in orphanages or go to Peru and witness to the locals. A team is always going out from my church and I've had a ton of opportunities to go on these trips, but I haven't been on one. I go to a Christian school and a lot of people there have "surrendered their lives to missions" and go on mission trips, and most of them pick up some pride while they're there. I think people read the "go" and miss all the other stuff. So I don't pray that God would send me on a trip, I pray that He would make me missional and have that kind of focus everyday. I don't want to go to Africa (or even Monday night outreach) and witness to people and then go home or to school and never talk about my faith. That's just not cool.

Well, I had a few more things on my list of things to write about, but I need to get ready for the band potluck. (I suppose after this post I should say "potblessing." lol.) Thanks for reading. :)

Much Love,

Marissa

Rants, Recommendations, and Realizations.

Hey everyone!

Rant #1: Books geared toward teenage girls that spell everything wrong.

The other day I spent an abnormally large amount of time at Family Christian. I had some coupons and they had some books I wanted, so we seemed like a perfect match. I looked at the clearance tables, then the Bibles, then the DVD's, and finally to the teen girl aisle. I don't particularly love the teen girl aisle; it seems a little shallow and self-centered, but I was on it. I skimmed the titles and even picked up a few books. I learned something that day. I learned that none of the authors on that aisle could spell. Actually, I think they just wanted their books to look like text messages. I have two problems with that: 1) If I wanted to read a text message, I would open my phone and read one. I obviously wanted to read a book. 2) Not everyone rites lyk dis when they text. I, for one, spell most things out and proofread before I send the message. Needless to say, none of the books I purchased came from that aisle.

Recommendation #1: Mark Driscoll

Wowsers. This guy is insane. I listened to his sermon on Ecclesiastes 12:9-13 last week. It pretty much changed my life. http://www.marshillchurch.org/media/sermons That's the link if you want to listen to him.

Realization #1: I don't want justice; I want a t-shirt.

I used to think that I was really selfless. I used to think that I cared deeply for the poor. I thought about orphans in Africa. I bought TOMS and told lots of people because everyone knows that they send a pair of shoes to needy kids with every pair you purchase. I got on the Invisible Children website and swore that, when I got a job, I would sponsor a kid through Compassion International. I prayed for kids in the Congo and spoke of my hatred for the Lord's Resistance Army. I wanted, and still want, to go on a mission trip to see poverty firsthand. But I don't want justice; I want a t-shirt. I want more Facebook Causes to join. I want to wave a banner saying, "Hey! Look how selfless and passionate Marissa is! She gives to the poor! She cares!" But she doesn't. Not today.

Rant #2: Children's Ministries

God: "Hey, Noah. You're a pretty good guy. I want to take you on a boat ride."
Noah: "A boat ride? What's that?"
God: "You'll see, and you'll be the first person to go on one. Come on, it'll be fun. I'll even let you take the animals and your family."
Noah: "The animals? Really? I get to take them? Ok, I'll go. It actually sounds kinda fun."

That's more or less how I learned the story of Noah's Ark. I didn't learn that it was a horrible judgment for horrible sins people committed. I didn't actually realize that people died until I read Blue Like Jazz. I thought it was just a nice little day on the water.

Are kids even supposed to get saved? I've never heard of anyone saying, "Man, I got saved when I was 4 and Jesus completely changed my life. He taught me so much in preschool." But I've heard a lot of people say, "I 'got saved' when I was 4, but I didn't really care that much about Jesus until I was 12." As Christians, we're called to be disciples. We're called to give to the poor. We're called to love. We're commanded to teach those younger than us. We're called to share our faith. We're commanded to not gossip. And that's just the beginning. How are kids who can barely talk expected to do all that?

If we don't tell kids the truth about God, what's the point of talking about God at all?

Recommendation #2: My favorite things this summer.

Journaling, reading, Twitter, swimming, splatter-painting, wraps(as in tortillas with cheese on them. ha), Come What May, and kayaking.

Realization #2: Our worth isn't based on us.

The other day I made a list of all the things that I think make me cool or give me my worth. I put things like hairstyles, certain books, writing, my hobbies, and my favorite clothes. As I was making this list, I realized that I base other people's worth on these things. But I don't think our worth is really based on those things. The Bible says that we were bought with a price, and that price was Jesus' life. The God of the universe said that we are worth His life. That is what we are worth. I'm not better than you. You're not better than me. Our worth is the same. Our worth is the God of the universe's life.

Well, I could write a lot more, but I think that's enough for now.

Much Love,
Marissa.

Simple.

Hello, kind blog readers! I hope you are having a wonderful summer so far!



I just got back from church camp. Ahhh, it was so much fun! We went rappelling and spelunking and we did a high ropes course and shot arrows out of bows. I met some lovely new people. It was great. Our speaker was so amazing; I learned so much. It was so cool actually meeting people instead of just Facebooking or Twittering them.
I compiled a list of all the inside jokes:

1) Michael's eye trick.

2)Everyone nearly dying on Pirate's Crossing.

3) Popsicles.

4) The Hike.

5) Rule #9.

6) Not shaving. haha.

7)No PDA/PDF/PDFWB

8) Cold and sleepy.

9)Boy stories with Kayla.

10)Cheez-Its on the porch.

11) Praying aloud/in groups!

12)Disgusting food and everyone getting sick from it.

13) Everyone moving to the other side of the cabin.

14) My eyes being half open while sleeping.

15) The "thinking" pose.

16) Not knowing anything about the speaker.

17) "It's camp. Who cares?"

18) Globe volleyball in the dorm.

19) The "in-crowd"



Good times, good times.



So, lately I've been pretty much obsessed with TOMS. I'm going to get the ash canvas ones as shown at the top of this post. They are so beautiful. I smile every time I see them. Haha.





I got a letter in the mail from Samaritan's Purse today. It was talking about the Lord's Resistance Army and how it's moving into the Congo. It makes me really sad. I'm definitely going to be praying that it will END. You should join me.




Much Love,
Marissa